So.

In 10 hours, I will be standing at a cemetary watching a coffin that is much to small being lowered into the ground.

The coffin belongs to Jake. Jake is the younger brother of one of my friends from high school. He was seven years old ten days ago when he succumbed to cancer.

There are so many words to describe what Jake was and will remain to all of those who were lucky enough to meet him. He was hilarious, brave, strong, tough, but most importantly, he was a lot older than seven.

I say that, because when Chae (Jake's sister) called me last Wednesday when it happened, she was obviously upset, but she told me that Jake was telling her not to cry, and that he would always be with her.

A seven year old kid, accepted his own fate. Just like that. He was more concerned for his family, when his life was about to be cut way too short. He was such a bright kid, who knows what he could have done?

But now it's over. And I understand that yes, he is in a better place now, and that he is not going to suffer anymore. But somebody will have to explain to me one day how it is fair in the first place for any life to be cut that short.

Jake is the third person I know to be taken by cancer. But it was never this difficult before. My grandfather was first, he lived with me in his last years, and it was almost a relief when he passed because he had deteriorated so much. The disease did a number on him and caused him constant pain. My grandmother was living with it for years and she went into the hospital, and everybody knew what was coming, it was a matter of time. She was the last of my grandparents to go, and still it was not that rough on me.

Jake, however, was just seven years old. And yes, he lived with cancer for a large portion of his life, but things were finally looking on the up and up for him. in fact, Tuesday of last week was a very hopeful day because they figured out a way to treat him, he had a chance, and a damn good one.

But they figured it out too late. And he passed the next day.

I know at this point I'm simply rambling. But I just had to say this somewhere, and this was my best available outlet.

I guess the point is, that though I find it unfair that Jake was taken so early in life... that I am glad I knew him. And, I just wish everybody got a chance to meet the kid with the smile who could light up a room and warm anybody's heart.

R.I.P.
November 6, 2000 - February 13, 2008

It isn't fair
It's always the ones who you could see going on to do big things...or at least being able to make people happy in life. The most frustrating thing is simply that there is nothing you can do about it.

There is so much in the world that isn't fair. In lazypuppy's blog there was a family who lost a child to SIDS. There were innocent lives taken by the gunman at the Illinois college. Taking a look on the news anyday and there will be something fucked up happening to all the wrong people...

I remember my first funeral. So far it's been the only one, and I hope it can stay that way for a while. But it was...god I don't even know how to explain. I tried my best to hide the tears behind my sunglasses as all of us stood there with the wind blowing gently through the grounds. It was so perfect and so wrong all at the same time.....

God. I don't even know the kid and it's like a blow in some inexplicable way. Maybe I can sympathize, because I would never want to feel what I imagine his family is feeling right now.

I'm rambling now too...I just don't know what to say. What is there to say? Sorry? My condolences? It doesn't even come close.
» The-Muffin-Man on 2008-02-23 07:04:27

Sorry, you do not have permission to comment.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.